Contraceptives

By now most of you will have seen or heard several news items covering the decision by an American Middle School to dispense contraceptives to 11 year olds.

67% of U.S parents agree (AP poll) that contraceptives should be provided (most prefer with parental consent) since they reduce teenage pregnancies but surely the issue is MUCH bigger than this folks?

You may be uncomfortable reading this, since it’s really a ‘call to action’ but SO much more work still needs to be done to prevent teenage pregnancies (et al) other than dispensing contraceptives in our schools.

Hopefully, being asked for an opinion on this matter has got us all taking a good hard look at how well our sex education curriculums are performing. Our children, even in Primary School, need to be carefully and adequately educated, both in and out of school, in sexual health (emphasis on health). Children are like little sponges, especially when it comes to matters of sex; they soak up a wealth of material about sex, from advertising material to hanging out with friends. As parents, relatives, friends and teachers, we have a duty of care to make sure that whatever myths, lies or truths are ‘wowed’, laughed at or feared, they can be talked about with someone who can put the record straight, so that our young people reach adolescence well equipped to face the hormonal storm.

Do you really think that an 11yr. old is ready to deal with sex at all, let alone get pregnant?

Sex education is a topic that should encompass all possible aspects and repercussions when the youngest ‘child’ in our society has sex.

If you have a child, I urge you to talk about this ’sex thing’ issue as soon as you feel the time is right - which will depend on how well you have built that personal ‘bond’ between you both - a tough job but one that will shape the way that your child moves through life, especially when it comes to coping with adolescence and sex. If we love our kids, we owe it to them to equip them with sufficient information to make the right choices, at the right time, when we are not there! Call it a street survival kit if you like but please don’t just make this important responsibility solely that of the school.

We cannot bury our heads in the sand and hope this will go away- it is probable that as you read this, there is another teenager dying a thousand deaths as she discovers she is pregnant and literally feeling sick at the thought of telling her parents(or worse, planning how to conceal it) There is another young woman stepping over the threshold of a clinic, scared out of her wits after deciding to have an abortion because there is no way in hell she can raise a child right now.

At the same time, Bush has decided to increase funding for ‘abstinence’ programmes which could just work IF he also hops onto a star and waves his magic wand to grant a few wishes:

• a wish that spending heaps of cash on telling teenagers NOT TO HAVE SEX will actually work (but if the programme is a good one………..!!!!!!!)
• a wish that teenagers don’t even think of having sex till at least 17 years of age
• a wish that teenagers would heed the law that states it is an offence to have sex with a minor
• a wish that teenagers would NOT heed the law of Nature when hormones compel them to be sexually explorative
• a wish that STD’s died out with the plague
• a wish that our obedient son or daughter would not dream of having ‘under age’ sex because it’s a sin
• a wish that ‘accidental’ pregnancies do not lead to more children in foster homes
• a wish that ‘abortions’ never have to be performed

I am not diminishing the size of the task that faces us all. Regardless of age, or where you are in the world, when a young person becomes sexually active (mentally and physically), that person should be able to draw upon a set of ‘coping’ tools which were freely supplied and fully explained during the ‘apprenticeship’ years by their ‘guardians’ or elders.

Some tools will include information about human biology, reproduction and contraceptives and their uses. Other tools will help them to handle the ‘head stuff’ as well as the physical stuff, which by it’s very nature, brings with it the emotional stuff (more so for girls than boys?)

THIS is where governments need to spend more cash- generously supplying and honing these tools to build a generation of knowledgeable and confidant young people so WHEN they decide they are ready for sex, we can be assured that they will make the choice that is right for them, protect themselves from unwanted pregnancies, STD’s, abortions AND develop into responsible family planners and future parents themselves.

However, to make a difference NOW, we don’t need lots of cash to talk to our children- so take a deep breath and if you’ve not done so before, take ‘baby’ steps- start with topics that are not too confronting while you build up to the ‘hot stuff’ - talking about what happens when you give yourself to a boy you believe you are ‘in love with’ or how to plan the ‘first time’ with your girlfriend so she knows you are being responsible. You’ll be glad you did when you’re waiting for them to come in from that first date!