Contraceptives

Go grab a latte, your partner and a quiet corner for half an hour of uninterruted time to talk contraceptives.

NOW- before the partying gets under way. If you don’t have a partner but are hoping to find one, (or several) all the more reason to make sure that YOU are prepared, after all, if ‘he’ can’t see how responsible you are being with your spare stash of condoms, then is he really the man for you?

PLAN to have a great time over Christmas enjoying sex but without the shadow of a pregnancy or an STI to mar the pleasure! I know you are thinking that spontaneous sex is part of the fun but it will be a lot more fun if the stress of an unwanted pregnancy or catching a sexually transmitted disease is a ‘no brainer’.
It only takes one little sperm to make it inside that egg and snuggle down into your womb to change your life forever.

Both you and your male partner share the responsibility if you become pregnant. Only you, as a woman, have the 9 months of pregnancy and labour to go through before possibly bringing up a child on your own.
Both you and your partner, equally, deserve to enjoy great sex together.

Put aside any awkwardness or inhibitions you may have to agree on which method of protection (s) you are both going to use, then when the excitement of the moment sweeps you away you will both be ready for a good time, relaxed in the knowledge that you are ’safe’ from an unwelcome surprise further down the track, when that magic moment is just a hazy memory (or worse, a huge mistake!)

Sadly, many men today still believe that it’s a woman’s responsible NOT to get pregnant- “You ARE on the pill, babe?’ Well, take a lead from the Netherlands guys and go ‘Double Dutch’ (the pill for the woman and the condom for the man). This practise keeps the teenage pregnancy rate low and enables sexually active young couples to grow up with a healthy, responsible attitude to sex - something wonderful to share. These young people are also educated in the role safe sex has to play as part of family planning. What a good foundation for managing their lives as future parents.

It’s about time we caught up and took our heads out of the sand, put the funding into sound sex education rather than ‘abstinence only’ programs. Don’t get me wrong here either, I would include a strong argument for abstinence within the sex education curriculum but hope that the content of the course was so relevant to today’s youth that it would empower them to make choices about sex that was right for them.
Granted, the introduction of the pill in the sixties brought a new sexual freedom for women and a 99.7% effectiveness rate against becoming pregnant. I am not going into the pros and cons of the pill here because this article is about BOTH partners taking responsibility for using contraceptives.

Contraceptive pills can cause side effects in some women so I am not saying that this is only answer, quite the opposite- talk to your doctor about what is best for you as IUD’s (intra uterine devices) may not be suitable for girls who have not yet had a baby. Some women prefer a contraceptive injection. Remember though, while these methods prevent pregnancy, none of these methods of contraception will stop you from getting an STI.

If you are starting a course of oral contraceptives for the first time, it will take a while for your body to adjust to the new hormone levels so reduce the anxiety of getting pregnant by using backup protection such as condoms /spermicide) for at least the first 3 months! Again, this article is about reducing anxiety and enjoying ‘festive’ sex without the ‘headaches’.

To protect against HIV/Aids and other STI’s - VITAL if you have several sexual partners over Christmas - you are best to use a barrier method that stops sperm from entering in the first place. Do you know how long sperm can survive once ejaculated? If not, check out this site a bit further down the page.

Male condoms are easily purchased from vending machines and pharmacies without prescription. Buy good quality brands made of latex and polyurethane. I think the best site for buying on line is this one.

If you prefer to use a female barrier method consider:

• the diaphragm
• cervical cap
• female condom
• contraceptive sponge

For these methods to be effective, they MUST be used/fitted correctly, which can be a bit tricky until you get the hang of it so have several trials prior to starting that round of parties!
WARNING. More teens fail with this method of birth control than adult women.

Humour goes a long way to breaking the ice for a chat with him on this topic girls but you’ll only have to do it once or twice before it becomes second nature to you . It’s in both your interests to talk about contraceptives before you feel pressured, compromised or conflicted and you’ll find that if he’s worth it, it will bring the stress down and the pleasure up.